Keep Off The Grass
Proceed through to the picture gallery
with displays of countryside scenes
to refresh the eye with long forgotten vistas:
Arabian deserts, English pastures, Asian rice-fields,
Alpine meadows, American prairies stretching to the horizon.
Continue on to the next room
where you will find an exhibition of species of wood:
rare specimens of richly grained oak, sandalwood and pine
from trees that once flourished on Earth
preserved for your grandchildren's children!
Here you will also find our amazing
floral show - each flower has been carefully replicated
from archive drawings with the most stunning accuracy.
Visit the museum shop to purchase a flower to take home,
each has its own particular perfume!
Finally no visitor should miss the pride of our collection:
a patch of real, yes real, green grass growing
in a glass cabinet in perfect atmospheric conditions
with miniature clouds producing rain at timed intervals.
Chairs are provided for contemplation.